Special Olympics

The Hans Gruber Memorial Exceptional Minds Foundation is dedicated to the advancement of humankind. Here man's most critical challenges are met and the greatest problems of the day are solved. Within this forum the highest echelon of human thought may be found.
4 posts • Page 1 of 1

Special Olympics

Postby El Capitano » May 13th, 2009, 12:23 am

Information has come to the light of the Agency that Hugo Chavez is planning to steal an ancient, powerful artifact at the next Olympic games, in London. You do not know who his team is, but it is likely made up of athletes from the most evil countries in existence:
Venezuala
Iran
North Korea
Somalia
McMudro Station (Antarctica)

You are tasked by your superior to put together a squad comprised of 5 elite United States summer athletes to either get the artifact first, or eliminate them if necessary. Any more and it will be unwieldy, any fewer and they will not be able to get the job done. What sports do you draw your team from?
El Capitano
Sr. Member
Sr. Member
 
Posts: 322
Joined: September 18th, 2007, 7:03 pm

Special Olympics

Postby WorldBFat » May 13th, 2009, 10:56 am

I'll throw basketball out there first.

Pros:
Large but fast
At the U.S. Olympic level, among the most reliably intelligent of athletes
A good source of one liners, as they have to hone their impromptu speaking abilities due to frequent media interaction
Can use basketball-themed secret weapons
Pre-existing footwear and clothing sources
A lot of basketball players are gun enthusiasts [st]such as Jayson Williams[/st]

Cons:
High variation in endurance and strength depending on which player you get
Extremely visible both due to stature and public recognition (would have to be a master of disguise)
Not an inherently weaponized sport (ie no javelins or bows)

Suggested choice:
LeBron James: outstanding athlete, known master of disguise (old man, freakish small child), guaranteed one-liner source... not sure what kind of weapons training he has though.
WorldBFat
Hero Member
Hero Member
 
Posts: 5695
Joined: September 18th, 2007, 3:07 am

Special Olympics

Postby Browntown » May 13th, 2009, 4:10 pm

My US Athletes will be the (soon to be) Olympic Dart throwing team. The fact that 2012 could be the 1st year for Olympic darts gives this team a fantastic edge over their unarmed opponents (we know McMudro Station has no fencing team). Their precision with tiny arrows makes them stealthy and lethally precise in their attacks. Poison darts for a quick take down, darts to trigger switches from afar, darts in a wall to form a foothold to scale walls! Endless possibilities with the dart.

Dartsmen are also notoriously crafty from hanging out in seedy bars, and would likely have many drinking aquaintences in London, as well as a fence lined up to pawn the artifact along with everything else they steal. The Dart player will be the rogue of the Olympic world, who better to steal 50 Cent's Crystal Skull then 5 of the ugliest Americans ever invited to the Olympics?
Browntown
Hero Member
Hero Member
 
Posts: 3733
Joined: September 18th, 2007, 2:19 am

Special Olympics

Postby El Capitano » May 13th, 2009, 10:15 pm

The way I see it a versatile team needs to be put together. This would include a leader, weapons expert, master of disguise/information, stealth/thievery/contortion, and a wild card.

A basketball player such as LeBron James, who has already led some of the most egotistical people in the world, would be a fine leader. He undoubtedly can manage their emotions and keep them focused, and is athletic enough to get the job done. It doesn't hurt that he has a sizable bankroll, in case cash is needed rather than the Agency's credit card.

I like a dart player as the information/disguise person. London is probably the darts capital of the world, so he undoubtedly knows all the ins and outs and where to get information.

Obviously some sort of gymnast would be appropriate as the thief. Make it a female, and you have a seductress as well.

A modern pentathlete is the obvious choice for weapons expert.
El Capitano
Sr. Member
Sr. Member
 
Posts: 322
Joined: September 18th, 2007, 7:03 pm


4 posts • Page 1 of 1

Return to Hans Gruber Memorial Exceptional Minds Foundation

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron
content top